[Critique Group 2] Leonard's comments on Val's sub

[Leonard Tuchyner]

Joyful innocence. 

What does that mean? 

Innocence might speak of the innocence of the child, before life happens. 

There are opportunities to regain glimpses ofthat innocence. From the open doors. 

But then you hear the note of derision, 

probably from someone  you know. 

Maybe yourself. 

He or she doesn’t know you have heard. 

That does great harm   to your trust, 

and the doors slam closed.   

You have been disillusioned. 

Trust has been overlayed by mistrust. 

The closed doors offer protection. 

You will chance opening them again when you feel ready.

 

 

Doors

 

Doors open

doors of light

streaming sun

the color of

joyful innocence

 

No need for worry

run and chase golden

dreams

laughing at summer rain

oors left ajar

hearing someone giggling

about you

not knowing you're listening

trust cracks like old paint

revealing deceit

 

Doors close

on bitter wind

aching bones and heart

hurt creeps in

underneath tearing sound

of disillusion

 

Doors hide

protect

remain so until

resolve returns

and I choose to

turn the knob

to push it wide

when I am ready

 

 




 
 
Leonard I. Tuchyner, Author
 
https://www.dldbooks.com/tuchyner/

 
  
 
 

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