[Critique Group 1] Marcia's late February submission

[Marcia Wick]

1568 words

 

Another chapter (following the start of the ice fishing contest)

 

The commotion on shore settled soon after the starting gun sounded.
Spectators worked their way to the pavilion for warmth and refreshments. The
contestants were quickly absorbed in the business of ice fishing. It would
be hours before the atmosphere heated up again. 

 

 

Claudia secured the lens cap onto her camera and packed her gear into her
backpack. She wouldn’t be required to report on the contest until closer to
its conclusion. She strapped on her cross country skis and ventured onto the
now-familiar trail that circled Doe Lake. She longed for some solitude away
from the revelers and noisy snowmobiles. 

 

The winners wouldn’t be announced until after three o’clock. She could
complete the 10-mile loop before then. Claudia soon hit her stride, but her
mind lingered behind like a faded love song long after the record needle was
lifted at the end of an album. She wondered if Hank was shivering, sitting
alone in his shanty. Or was Veronica keeping him warm. 

 

I don’t care either way, Claudia tried to tell herself. She wouldn’t let
another man play her for a fool, or trust the friendship of a woman who was
obsessed with men. The scent of Veronica’s perfume on Hank’s collar had
jolted Claudia out of her fantasy.  She wasn’t a naïve school girl anymore.

 

Even though Claudia had confided her affection for Officer Braun to her
presumed friend, Ronnie had gone ahead and hooked up with Hank behind
Claudia’s back. Why had Claudia been surprised? After returning from New
York, Veronica had telephoned Claudia at home and work, but Claudia had
refused to take her calls or call her back.

 

Good riddance, she was thinking when a demanding voice intruded on her
reverie.

 

“Claudia, Claudia—wait up.”

 

Claudia at first thought she was imagining the first time Veronica had
called out her name on the frigid Doe Lake trail New Year’s Day morning. She
shook off the memory and picked up her pace. She was determined to get
Ronnie and Hank out of her head.

 

“Claudia, please wait up.”

 

This time, Claudia stopped and looked over her shoulder to convince herself
that Veronica wasn’t following her. But, there she was—full-figured in her
fitted stretch pants and matching jacket—the picture of everything Claudia
wasn’t.

 

“Not today, Veronica,” Claudia moaned. “Can’t you take a hint? I don’t want
anything to do with you
or hank.”

 

Claudia pushed off at a sprint, hoping to leave Veronica behind in a flurry
of snow, but of course Veronica could out-pace her. In 10 strides, Ronnie
managed to cut Claudia off, forcing her to an abrupt stop. Off-balance,
Claudia crumpled to the ground, reduced like a child to indulge in a
tantrum.

 

“Why can’t you leave me alone? Give me a break. You can have Hank if you
want him. I don’t want anything to do with either one of you.” Claudia
thumped her gloved fist on the snow.

 

“Claudia, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m not interested in
Hank, other than as a cop. Give me a chance to explain.”

 

“What’s to explain?” Claudia cried. I know you were with him before you went
on your business trip. Your exotic perfume gave you away.”

 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Veronica reached to help Claudia
stand, but Claudia yanked her arm away and Ronnie fell on top of her friend.

 

“Get off me,” screamed Claudia. “I don’t need your help to stand. In fact, I
can’t stand to be near you.”

 

Veronica lay splayed atop Claudia, their skis tangled like pick-up sticks in
the powder.

 

“Damn it, Claudia. Don’t be so stubborn,” Veronica fought for control. “Let
me explain. You’re gonna feel like a fool when I do.”

 

“I’m no fool, Veronica. Maybe I mistook you for a friend at first, but I
won’t be fooled a second time.” Claudia managed to get free. She unsnapped
her ski bindings and struggled to her feet. Hands on hips, she glared at
Veronica and kicked snow into her pretty face.

 

“Take that!”

 

Veronica was ready. She saw the kick coming and grabbed Claudia’s ankle mid-

Air. Claudia collapsed in a heap and Veronica soon pinned her like a varsity
wrestler would.

 

“Now, now you listen to me, Claudia Krump. I don’t know where you got the
idea I would cut into your time with Hank. Yeah, the guy’s attractive but
he’s not my type.”

 

Claudia tried to wriggle free but only succeeded in digging a deeper hole in
the snow.

 

“Then tell me. Why would Hank have your rich scent all over him when he came
over for lunch the day you left town?” Claudia spit snow off her chapped
lips.

 

“If you’d stop fighting me, I’ll tell you.” Veronica tightened her grip. “We
did meet for coffee that morning—not because it was a date. He’s a cop,
remember? I asked him to investigate something for me.”

 

“Like investigate your finer features?” Claudia stiffened in apparent
compliance. “Could you let me up now?”

 

“If you promise to listen,” Veronica said. She wiped melting snow from her
face and scowled at Claudia. “Someone is threatening me, and I asked Hank to
investigate.”

 

Veronica sat Indian-style on the cold trail beside Claudia and continued. 

 

“First, someone left a threatening note on my desk at work. Another note was
left in my mailbox at home. The creep even tracked me down in New York City.
I was counting on Hank to figure out who is stalking me.”

 

“Veronica, that’s awful,” Claudia said. “What kind of threats? Who would do
that to you?”

 

“That’s what I’d like to know,” Veronica hung her head. “I’ve got a couple
of ideas—I hoped Hank could poke around while I was out of town and put the
scare into someone so it would stop.”

 

“And did he?” Claudia asked.

 

“Hank might be good looking but he’s not such a top-notch detective. Looks
like I’ll have to trap the bastard myself.”

 

Claudia offered Veronica an arm, and they helped each other stand.

 

“Hank didn’t say anything to me about working for you when I accused him
of—you know.”

 

“I told him to keep it to himself. In a small town like Doe Lake, word gets
out.”

 

“Why didn’t you tell me yourself, Veronica? Friends don’t keep secrets, you
know.”

 

“Actually, Claudia, I was going to share another confidence with you when we
were having lunch at Millwood, remember? But that’s when a second
threatening note landed on my desk and I hustled you out so I could call
Hank for advice.”

 

“Now I remember
What were you going to tell me that day? I’m not sure how
much more I can take.”

 

“Let’s start skiing and I’ll explain. This summer, I’m planning to leave Doe
Lake
”

 

Veronica and Claudia matched stride while Veronica revealed her intention to
move to Vermont and finish her book when her trust funds were released on
her birthday. On the one hand, Claudia was delighted to learn that Ronnie
was determined to complete her novel and, once and for all, escape the
limelight of her mother. On the other hand


 

Veronica interrupted Claudia’s pity-party. “You understand Claudia, I don’t
want anyone in Doe Lake to know my plans. They might figure out who I am,
and then life would be impossible for me around here.”

 

“I get it,” said Claudia, “but what about me? I’m gonna be stuck in Doe Lake
forever, alone and miserable. And just when I thought I’d found a real
friend.”

 

“But you have, Claudia. In fact, I’ll prove to you what a good friend I am.”

 

As the women continued to cut tracks through the sparkling snow, Veronica
divulged her idea for Claudia to apply for the vacant job at Millwood, and
pursue her dream for a romantic relationship with Officer Braun.

 

“You and Hank will fall in love and get married. You’ll have two cats in the
yard and two kids in the back seat of your car,” Veronica teased. “But
seriously, there’s one thing standing in the way of my plan, and that’s
Hamilton, the ‘Hawk.’ You remember meeting her at the open house?” Veronica
looked at Claudia’s face for recognition.

 

“The bitch with the beak-like nose?” Claudia lifted her eyebrows.

 

“That’s the one. She wants a promotion that’s coming up to manage the
Marketing Department, but I know the big wigs want to offer the job to me. I
figure I’ll take the promotion just to stick it to Hamilton even though I’m
leaving town. That way, you can step into the higher-paying job when I’m
gone--check and checkmate.”

 

“What makes you think I can do your job at Millwood? Or that Hank will fall
in love with me?”

 

“Why wouldn’t he? And why couldn’t you?”

 

“Because you’re Veronica Barringer and I’m Claudia Krump,” said Claudia.
“Our names spell it out. You’re a beauty queen and I’m a plain Jane. You’re
Archie’s Veronica and I’m your side-kick bumbling Betty.”

 

Veronica came to a sharp stop. “I can’t believe my ears,” she said, patting
the sides of her head. “You’re not a plain Jane or bumbling Betty from the
comic book. Why, you’re Claudia Krump, the intrepid small town newspaper
reporter, the woman who is going to lead Doe Lake into the 20th century.
Have confidence in yourself.”

 

“Okay, coach,” grumbled Claudia. “But I’m not convinced my future is as rosy
as you seem to think.”

 

# # #

 

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