[Critique Group 2] Fwd: Leonard's comments on Alice's sub

[Leonard Tuchyner]

Leonard I. Tuchyner, Author
 
https://www.dldbooks.com/tuchyner/

 
  
 
 




-----Original Message-----
From: Leonard Tuchyner <tuchyner5 at aol.com>
To: group22 at bluegrasspals.com <group22 at bluegrasspals.com>
Sent: Tue, Nov 29, 2022 11:14 am
Subject: Leonard's comments on Alice's sub


 

Champion of the Carousel

 

byAlice Jane-Marie Massa

There is a question or a conflict here.  

The ponies love their lot in life. 

Of the safety of going up and down and listeningto the music of the farosel. 

But they have forgotten the wild ways 

they will never see the freedom that comes with the unknown.

With a sense of regret she   congratulates  the trainer 

for having created this hourse whose will hasbeen broken.  

I take this a metaphor  for the trade offs we have made to live inthis illusory  world. 

History has shown that this too will end.

 

 

 

These thoughts upon the carousel--

of horses sculpted to excel

in sliding down and up and up and down,

statues whirling round and round

to thrill the child and bring the smiles,

lap after lap, for miles and miles.

 

Forever tethered to each shining pole,

still destined to this solitary role--

the painted ponies know their world of grace,

know they’ll never leave this place.

How safe!  How sweet!  Themusic plays.

Protected from the rains and sunny rays,

too many enameled ponies forget

the fields, the prairies, the meadowlands,

spirit, freedom, hoofs on warm sand.

 

Blue ribbons for the trainer who trained you sowell,

broken spirit of a pony—

but champion of the carousel!

 

number of lines: 18

 

Looking forward to our chat about poetry on nextMonday, the 21st, at the new time of 3:00 p.m., Eastern Time!

Alice

 

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Leonard I. Tuchyner, Author
 
https://www.dldbooks.com/tuchyner/

 
  
 
 

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