[Critique Group 2] Leonard's comments on Val submission

[tuchyner5 at aol.com]

I  love thispiece.  




 


The title, Remisssion, gives the meaning of this poem away. 



It is how you sometimes experience remission coming on.




 


Val sub for September




 



 


Remission



VM 9-17-21




 


Another glance,



Another look, Perspective.




 



 


open way glimmers




 


You see an opening for remission.




 



 


between cracks in



wall finely constructed.




 


You see cracks  in  thewall. 



When you  say ,”finelyconstructed,” 



do you mean the wall has been constructed well, 



or does it mean that it is flimsily made?




 



 


Echoes of my name



squeeze my spirit



through beams of energy




 


Your name and spirit are forced through the cracks. 



You hear something calling. 



You recognize who you are. Just barely.




 


calling.




 


Discarding mind clutter,



I hear bright sound--



sweet song, chrystal water,



my heart's gentle rhythem.




 


A number of  positive  things anchor you.  



Call you forth. 




 


It's time.




 


 Its time forremission.



_______



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