[Critique Group 2] Emailing: 1-21-21 Group-2 critiques

[James]

1-21-21 Group- 2 critiques 

1. Alice's piece:

An extremely powerful and moving piece. The format is well conceived since a
true dialogue is not possible. The repeating of lines gives the piece
increased impact. What can one say other than I fully support WC
07.15.19.50. I didn't realize that this was a fictional poem until I went
back to get the number of the bill and I must say, it is quite a welcome
relief!  

2. Valerie's piece:

hope, a subject that has been very much on my mind recently. The whiteness
covering the dark and "Luminous, brilliantly simple,
lights bare winter" are symbolic indications of there still being hope. The
original title is interesting. I think many in these very dark days are
afraid to go all in and allow Full Hope to overcome the profound damage of
the last four years like a huge rising tide. Sadly I think cautious hope may
be safer if not better. 

3. Leonard's piece:

On a bad or tired day, even with functional light perception and a Cain, one
can still "list to the right." An inimitably Leonard-like analysis of the
challenges of learning Cain travel. I really liked this line: "All this in
hope of deserving a dog, by proving I don't need one to find my way." And, I
caught the reference to the Shadow. I truly enjoy such things in a poem.

4. Joan's piece:

Ok, I think I may fully get this one. As to form, the use of alliteration in
the first stanza sets a tone and a flow. The subtle rhymes of lines 2 and 3
& 5 and 7 add to the flow, like a living silvery river? The living silvery
river's flow: "within and above" illustrates the on going connection
between our living silvery tributaries into the eternal flow. And as poets,
I think we all hope that after we join the living silvery river that is
above, our language may still linger.  

  
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