[Critique Group 2] Leonard's comments on Brad's pieces

tuchyner5 at aol.com tuchyner5 at aol.com
Tue May 12 13:48:25 EDT 2020










This is notwhat we expect from you, but it is the same great style.





It is a ratherbleak interpretation of the city. 





Unfortunately,it is the same way I tend to interpret it. 





But there areother interpretations  





For example, Ihave a friend who walks the bowrey, using a grocery cart to steady herself. 





She’s almostninety  and is a retired nun. 





She works asoup kitchen and gives counsel to the people there. 





What is notknown, is that she  is an aunt to arather well known polotitian  there, 





and she livesin a rather nice apartment.






 




City Serenade





C By Brad Corallo





Word count 291






 




The 2 bit,counterfeit biker boy





with his Kawasaki and his vinyljacket





brags about, he'son the street





but his dad's ina high tax bracket.





Maybe istrying to rebel against his father and find himself.






 




And scarredlittle Tommy-Suzie





tryin' to figureout what she is.





How did sheget scarred?






 




Wanna speculatein real estate?





Those nice gentsin suits, scam masters, connected brutes.





Chances areyou'll buy a farm. 





fast and withouta trace. 





Cops just shaketheir heads, not our business!





Absolutely, noalarm!






 




Wheelchairveteran, greasy matted hair





hangs on thecorner with his flag and cup.





Aint getting muchaction today.





Zoned out people,shuffle by 





no earthly reasonto look





 up.





What’s behindthose eyes?






 





 




And 2 blocksdown, an African guy in a turban





is preaching forJesus and redemption.





Handin' out soupkitchen chits and holy tracts.





but no body paysattention!





And yet, hekeeps on preaching.






 




In the park bythe old war monument,





currency andproduct change hands





Business schooldropouts, black market sharps





offer Chemdog andMexStar, top name brands






 




Screech of sirensas the cops 





blow down 53rdchasin'





some unholymaniac in a djellaba,





wielding a loadedcross bow





screamingsomething about justice!





We have to dosomething about those crossbows. Don’t you have to have a license for them






 




Air horns blow,air breaks grab.





Buses push ahead,cars backfire.





Are thosegunshots?H





Was That lastverse written by someone with Psd?






 




Hordes of peoplehurry down broken sidewalks.





Trying to getfrom here to there with minimal eye contact. 





What’s behindthose eyes?






 




Wafting smells ofItalian food cooking





mingle withscents of overflowing litter baskets. 






 




Just another dayin the city.





Where life is onthe cheep





and uptownplayers look so pretty.





Maybe not sopretty.






 




Down a filthyalley





spatter-dotpainted with trash and broken glass-





behind a dumpsterreeking from rotting restaurant scraps-





A gray, strayflea bitten tabby





tenderly suckles hernew born kittens.  





That was thetenderest thing yu said.





jamesstarfire at gmail.com





  





-----

The poem is good, especially  

in the use of alliteration.  There are a few words that I questioned . Thepoem has  a lot of descriptions thatdescribe the way I feel. 








 


hismusic.            




 


Ambiguity, Mentalhealth and Covid 19



C By Brad Corallo




 



 



 


Hi, I'm Brad andI am the Senior Rehab Counselor in a local not-for profit



agency. Part ofmy work is in our PROS mental health program. Pros means:



PersonalizedRecovery Oriented Services. This program assists folks with



varied issues todevelop the coping strategies and skills needed to



accomplish theirpersonal goals. The program has a mental health clinic



which providespsychiatry, and individual/ group therapy. I am 1 of 2



psychotherapists.




 


When Covid 19exploded on the scene, we were asked to provide "Tele-Care,



which involvessupportive daily telephone contacts.




 


As a professionalwith a visual impairment, I have been able to work from



home providingsupport and psychotherapy to 13 clients via telephone. All is



carefullydocumented. 




 


This enables meto not expose my self to possible infection by avoiding SCAT



to commute. Ihave been working this way for one month.




 


The hardest thingfor my clients to handle about this unique situation is



the lack of clearanswers as to how long Covid 19 will impact us all.



Unfortunately, nobody really knows. There is a theory that the greater the



ability to handleambiguity in life, the more mentally healthy a person is.



For many of myclients, ambiguity is the toughest thing. A lack of clear



answers causesincreased anxiety and frustration. So I am assisting my



clients to bettermanage both these feelings and the pandemic's reality.




 


Fortunately formany, it seems to be working.




 


For me, writinghas been helpful. I didn't plan to write about Covid 19. It



seemed too big anddevastating to inspire creativity. Well, after hearing



new lyrics by BobDylan "Murder Most Fowl", non- virus related, I wrote the



poem below. 




 


*** 




 


No Direction Home



Word count 49




 


Adrift, alone onoceans unknown



Surrounded,solely by sea and sky



Wide waters wail,wearily waiting



How do waters wail.




 


Uncharted,untraveled Unimagined uncertain 



Thousandthoughtful theories threaten



Absorbed, angry,alertly agitated 



Vast Vertiginous,viral vista



Foreseeable fate,fathomless fear\



Did you mean to use forseaable, or did you meanunforseeable.




 


though,relatively resolute, resigned and ready! 




 


Total documentword count: 501




 


jamesstarfire at gmail.com  



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Ambiguity, Mentalhealth and Covid 19-version for 4-30-20-Group 2, critique



session




 



 


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