[Critique Group 1] Leonard's comments on DeAnna's sub

[Leonard Tuchyner]

DeAnna subfor Oct. 22

 

I like this


 

. I wonderif all the one’s talking were fairies except for  Sassy

. Otherthan that it is very clear. 

Is thisanother way of talking about los of  habitat  from a funny point ofview. 

Inconsiderateneighbors is a kind way of putting it.  

It alsosays that  humans are taking the magic outof life. 

Or maybe,the life out of magic. 

Good job.

 

 

When TheWrong Folk Move in Next Door

By DeAnna Quietwater Noriega

 

Thwack! atennis ball whipped   past Sassy’s nose, ricocheting off the branch whereshe clung.

               “Damn it! Humans make awful neighbors! SHE FUMED. Sassy wrapped her fluffysquirrel tail around her trembling body.

“They haveno consideration for those who already live where they

build theirhouses,” commented Fern.

“You’reright,” replied Larkspur. “They murdered the goldenrod, iris and buttercups toput in a tennis court. They have definitely brought the quality of living inthis neighborhood down. Don’t even get me started about the noise and airpollution they bring with them!”

“Thiswas such a magical place to dance in the moonlight, on midsummer’s Eve,”mourned Iris. “We may have to move deeper into the forest,” she sighed.

“Ihope not,” chittered Sassy. “You fairies have been such good neighbors. Wewoodland creatures would miss you terribly.”

“Hmmm, let’s think aboutthis,” murmured Fern. “What if we make it so unpleasant for them, they decidenot to stay?” asked Fern.

“Iknow we don’t have your magic, but my folk would want to help with plans todrive these inconsiderate humans away. The problem is we are vulnerable totheir chemical poisons, traps and mechanical devices,” warned Sassy.

“Let’s roll that tennis ballinto that patch of poison ivy. You can act as lookout Sassy and let us know ifone of them is coming to look for their fuzzy menace,” directed Larkspur.

“Oh,this could be fun,” giggled Iris.

 

 

 

 

 




 
 
Leonard I. Tuchyner, Author
 
https://www.dldbooks.com/tuchyner/

 
  
 
 

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