[Critique Group 1] Notes for December2020 Critique Session

[Deanna Noriega]

Deanna

Scarlet Ribbons for her hair

The real story

 

Marcia

Stop Grading Students during the Pandemic

 

Logical and well written. One of my concerns is for the children who have
been turned into latchkey children with no access to technology. Not all
children stand on the same playing field. Some of them will come from
families with food insecurity, no access to internet, no devices on which to
attend virtual school. In rural settings, there is no high speed internet. I
know that the libraries in my state have spent cares funding to setup
hotspots in their parking lots so that children can access the net while
being socially distant. However, their parents may not have the option to
drive them to a library parking lot. They may be working at low paying jobs
and need to work in order not to become homeless. What is needed is remedial
programs to help children to catch up once schools open again. I think the
current situation will lead to a greater gap between the haves and have
nots. There is a day long basketball game going across the street from me
for as long as there is sunlight. Television should be broadcasting school
or educational programming too. 

 

Leonard

 

Flying High

tossed me around, jaunting and jibing,

I am unclear as to the meaning of this line.

Perhaps jauntily jibbing?

I think the poem otherwise is good.

 

 

Cleora

The Lonely Room

Int, Fragmentary word, perhaps you meant into or in the?

On the way, a truck plowed into the back end of their vehicle throwing
Charlie out through the passenger side window and Charlene over the front
seat and into the windshield.

If the car was rear-ended, shoved forward the passengers would have been
jerked in the same direction, not one pitched sideways and one pitched
forward over the backseat.

Otherwise, it is a poignant picture of unbearable grief.

 

 

Sally

 

Silent Night

As usual, you capture a moment in time and ground it gracefully into a
snapshot, with delicate strokes you distill your memories.

If it were a photograph, it would be in sepia tones.

Lovely, as always

 

Hugs,

DeAnna

 

-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://bluegrasspals.com/pipermail/group1/attachments/20201230/8bbfea1a/attachment.html>