[Critique Group 1] Leonard's comments on all

[tuchyner5 at aol.com]

Cleora




 


The general direction ofthe story is very interesting. It is holding my interest. The dialogue is good,even though it is not always certain who is doing the speaking. I think thetransitions need more description for clarification. I eventually got it all straightenedout in my brain, but I think the story would flow better if these elucidationswere made.  I’ll be more specific in thecomments below.




 


Day 5)




 


Shortly aftertakeoff, Sitting and Grasshopper flew into a torrential downpour. Not being astrong flier, Sitting soon became exhausted. She landed, and started walking inwhat she hoped was a southward direction.




 


“Could you duckyour head? I'm getting drenched,” said grasshopper.




 


Sitting tiltedher bill toward the ground. This made it easier for grasshopper to see what wasstraight ahead. They hadn't gone far when they could just make out a humanoidcreature in front of them. He was herding some sheep and goats into an unsteadyold shack. Beyond him, was a field of corn and wheat ripe for harvest. Thinkingeven a rickety old shack was better than being out in the rain, Sitting mingledwith the other animals being ushered into the building.



Finding a nicedry place in one corner, she settled down on some straw to wait out the storm.“Do you suppose this is the storm the Queen Bee was talking about?”



When Sitting went into the shack with all those hoofedanimals, wasn’t she in danger of being trampled, being invisible and all that.




 



 


“I don't know.Maybe,” answered grasshopper.




 


a nearby ewelooked around in their direction. Seeing a black ewe close by, she said, “Don'tknow. It is a magic storm. It started from an enemy spell cast early thismorning. It is expected to last five more days.”



I’m confused. I thought they were outside thekingdom and all its magic. Also, who is speaking here? Maybe some moredescription of their flight that makes it clear that they have not yet flownbeyond the kingdoms would help.  Also aword or 2 to remind the reader that the duck and grasshopper are invisible. Ofcourse it becomes clear in retrospect, but I think it would read smoother ifthere were these transitional elements.




 


The black ewelooked at her. “How do you know that?”




 


“It was in theprovince news.”




 


“When did you seethe province news?”




 


“An ant from theCrystal Pond castle said the Queen bee there told him.”




 


Suddenly allchances of carrying on a conversation was drowned out by the clattering oflarge hail pounding the roof of the unsteady shack. It went on for severalminutes until Sitting felt sure it would demolish the building and kill themall.




 


“Whew,” said thesheep when it finally stopped. “I'm glad I was in here when that started.”




 


“Yeh,” said oneof the goats who had walked over to the corner. “I hope the new ruler can dosomething about this terrible war.”




 


“Yeh,” saidanother.




 


A ram joinedthem. “Me, too,” he said. “But, I heard one of the ants from the Crystal Pondcastle say that Queen Sitting has disappeared. They believe she may have flownaway. No one has seen her since early this morning.”



If Sitting has been flying at least part ofthe time, how did word of her disappearance keep up with her?




 


A chill ran overSitting. She started cautiously making her way toward the door. One thing shedidn't want to happen was for this bunch of animals to realize she was thatAWOL ruler.



As she neared thedoor, the human pushed it open and stepped outside. Sitting waddled 



I didn’t know the humanoid was in the barn withthem. Did he overhear the discussion?




 


carefully pasthim. She stared ahead in shock. The beautiful crops that had been ready forharvest when they went into the barn, now lay in ruins. A few bare stalks werestill standing but all the corn and wheat had been destroyed. There was ablanket of large hail covering the ground. She followed the human as he walkedover to the field.



“This terriblewar,” he said, shaking his head. He bent down and brushed aside some of thehail to reveal a small green sprout just pushing itself up out of the ground.“Thank goodness for the fertile lands spell cast by Dark Merlin. If not forthat, the new crops would not grow and mature in time.”




 


Sitting heardbleating behind her. Looking around, she saw the sheep and goats coming out ofthe barn.




 


“Where do youthink the new ruler is?” asked a Billy goat.




 


“I don't know,”said the Ram. “She made short work of the dragon, but doesn't seem to know whatto do about what is happening now.”




 


Sitting waitedfor the flock to move out of hearing range before launching herself once againinto the air, and heading south.




 


She hadn't flownfar before she started looking around for a place to land. “Flying is hardwork,” she said as she landed on top of a cliff, and ran a few steps forwardbefore stopping at the edge.




 


“what's thatnoise?” asked Grasshopper.




 


Sitting tiltedher head toward the sound. In the valley below, an army of berserkers and axemen were locked in a fierce battle with an army of skeletons and ghouls. Thebattle was beginning to turn in favor of the army closest to them as the sunwas nearing the horizon. At last the other army started falling back andfinally turned and ran. It had been 



Describe which army you are talking about ratherthan using the word ‘other.’




 


a tough battlebut the forces defending the valley had won. Four axe men took up posts on the sidesof the area remaining alert ready to sound the alarm should another attack comewhile the others tended to the wounded.



I think we need a little more information aboutthe two armies.




 


Sitting launchedherself off the cliff and glided down to a clear area at the edge of the battleground. She moved her head from left to right, taking in the whole view. Nearone edge of the area was a banner on a tall pole. A slight breeze straightenedthe flag enough for them to make out the crest and colors. They read HadesLegions above the picture of a crumbling castle with the words Crumble To Dustbelow it.




 


“That's DogBreath's army,” said Sitting. “I wonder who the other army was.”



Wouldn’t the banners have been there when Sittingarrived on the scene. It would have been helpful to me if I knew who the forceswere  at the beginning .




 


As they watched,Dog Breath came riding up followed by several wagons. They were still gatheringup the dead and tending to the wounded when an army of swordsmen and knights onhorses came out of the darkness and attacked them. A few of Dog Breath'ssoldiers fought valiantly to delay the enemy while the others escaped. Sittingand 



I’m confused. Why aren’t the attackers skeletonsand such? 




 


Grasshopperwatched in horror as the new army utterly destroyed the meager exhaustedremains of Dog Breath's army. It wasn't clear if Dog Breath was among the onesthat escaped. The banner of the new army showed a greyish shimmering coat ofmail over the words shadow mhail, but they were unable to make out the name ofthe kingdom it 



belonged to. Oneof the knights rode up to the army commander.



I don’t get the picture of the banner here. Itneeds more description. Apparently, this is a third army. Very confusing.




 


“Do we pursuethem?”



What army is the questioner from?




 


“Yes. Our missionis to completely destroy them. They defeated our friend province, ShroudedGraveyard of Silent Enigma. We must not let them escape. .”




 


“How far are wegoing to go?”




 


“Whatever ittakes to make the new monarch of Hades Legions surrender. We must keep thepressure on. Word is they are ready to break. They have elected a duck, of allthings.”




 


“A duck? I likeduck. We can have a feast when it is over.”




 


An evil gleamappeared in the commanders eyes. “I agree. Maybe we should make that a part ofthe reward for our help,” he chuckled.




 


“How long do youthink we can get away with interfering in this war? I hear the king got athreatening message warning us to back off.”




 


“It won't matter.Hades Legions is about to surrender. The duck is stupid and inexperienced. Shehas no interest in this fight. She will surrender, or flee. I don't care which.Victory is ours.”



Why are they attacking Fog Breath’s army?




 


Sitting sat asafe distance away, unable to believe her ears.




 


“Yep. We stand tobe rewarded handsomely if that stupid duck they have for monarch now can bescared into surrendering.”




 


Another knightrode up carrying the banner for Crumble to Dust. “I heard a rumor that the duckhas flown.” 




 


“To bad,” saidthe first knight. “I was looking forward to roast duck,” he smirked.




 


“How could thishappen?” Sitting whispered. “Doggie is a mighty warrior. He and his crewrebuilt the ruined battlement on my castle.”




 


The knight tossedthe banner to the commander who caught it, broke it in half, and threw it onthe ground.



How can you break a banner? It’s made of cloth.




 


Sitting's bloodboiled. She ran up to the warrior and tried to bite him on his rump, but onlysucceeded in jamming her bill into the seat of his armor.



They are right. She is stupid.




 


Clank!




 


He turned, andlooked all around. “What was that?” 




 


Sitting aimedlower and nipped a nearby soldier on the heal.




 


He grabbed hisheal and looked around. Seeing nothing, “Let's get out of here! This place ishaunted.”



Oh, now I get it. She’s invisible.




 


Sitting took thehand of one of the dead soldiers and began to pull on it. The corpse began tosit up.




 


Grasshopperstarted rubbing his wings together making an eerie screeching noise.




 


“For real,” saidanother, his eyes growing big as he watched the dead body rise. “There'snothing here worth taking. We defeated the army, that's what we came to do, notto risk our lives against weird magic. Let's get out of here.”




 


With that, thearmy gathered its things and fled.




 


“That wasfun," said Sitting.




 


“Yep. Nowwhat?" 




 


“Something iscurious to me.” 




 


“What's that?” 




 


“What is going onhere. They were talking about me like this battle was supposed to scare me intosurrendering, and this army wasn't from the kingdom we are at war with.”




 


“I noticed that,too.”




 


Sitting andgrasshopper sat in stunned silence for a long while before Sitting followed thesmell of water to a stream running through the center of the valley. They foundsome plants and insects along the bank to satisfy their hunger, thenGrasshopper got back in the carrier, raised the windshield and lowered thevisor to secure himself in the carrier and make them invisible again. Sittingpaddled out into the middle of the stream, laid her head on her back, and thetwo of them drifted off to sleep while the stream gently carried them along.



To becontinued...




 


I thought Sitting was going to decide to go backto her throne. Her adventures, after having flown the coop, have been fortuitous.Making a decision to gather intelligence  would be a good move. But so far, she has not voiced her desire to doso. She is going with the flow, so to speak.




 


Deanna



I love the way you have mixedstory telling between author, the guide dog talking in first person and poetry. Ilike the contrasting of two different dogs that were opposites with much incommon. It keeps the reader engaged not only by the story itself but by the differentperspectives and styles.  There is alsothe contrast of what was and what is. In the first poem you are talking to anew guide about the guide from the past. Including the first step of raising aguide dog through the device of a letter to the boy who raised griffin is great.  Hearing about the transition of the dog fromtrainer to life partner from a guide dog’s perspective is wonderful.  The telling of all the travel that wasexperienced by Griffinwas a great way to further describe the author’s life and accomplishments.  I’m ready for the next half of the chapter.



Griffin



Griffin was my sixth canine partner.  He wasa lovely sensitive male German shepherd Dog.  Although Tammy had been halfGerman Shepherd, she looked most like a black Labrador.Griffin’stemperament was closer to hers. I wrote this poem about transitioning from mylarge, alpha Gentry to my smaller graceful Shepherd boy.



 



Different



 



His stride was confident and decisive,



His movements forceful.



You are gentle and sometimes hesitant.



He was powerfully built and dense with muscle.



You are almost delicate,



Beautiful instead of handsome.



His head was wide,



Framed by long silken ears.



Yours is narrow with ears that speak yourthoughts.



His coat was sleek gleaming midnight.



Yours is two toned.



No longer can I rely on black skirts and slacks toremain looking neat.



He always thought he knew best where we weregoing.



You cock your head asking,



“Is this right?”



So many ways you are not the same.



When we crossed the street,



And you paused in anxious thought.



I said “Forward, and you inched ahead,



Pressing your lovely face and slender shoulders into a bush,



Providing me clearance past a pole,



And then you leapt joyfully in to the air!



Spun to place your paws on my shoulders



And kissed my cheek.



I knew then, that in the ways that really matter,



You are the same.



Little shepherd, his Labradorpaw prints are large for your small feet to fill.



But I know you can do it.



For in your heart, you are just the same.



You’ll love and protect me as did he.



And guide my steps over the smoothest path you canfind.



 



Griffin required a cheerleader to perform at hisbest.  His pride in his work boosted by a lot of attention and praiseenabled me to travel to Mexicotwice, Hawaii twice, to visit the Caribbeanand to represent various affiliates of the American Council of the Blind inlegislative seminars in Washington D.C.  He believed that hewas a seventy-five pound lap dog. I will place here a story I wrote from Griffin’s perspective forhis puppy-raiser. I have always tried to send at least one letter to each ofthe raisers of my dogs to thank them for the love and early training they havegiven my dogs. Griffin’sraiser was a young boy, the youngest of six children. He tried hard to tell meabout his puppy. That is why I thought he might like to hear from Griffin himself about hislife as a guide dog.



WHERE OH WHERE DID YOUR LITTLE DOG GO?



(The story of a traveling dog)



By Griffin (a Male GermanShepherd Dog, 



graduate of TheSeeing Eye Inc.) 



 



               In late October of 1998, , I met a lady I wasn’t too sure I would like.  Ihad grown up as a boy’s puppy. He taught me not to chew up stuff that didn’tbelong to me, to stay off furniture and to be a good boy.   Then Ilearned to love a man who taught me how to work as a  dog guide.  Oh,the lady had a soft voice.  She sat on the floor to cuddle and comfort mewhen I  whimpered for my trainer, whose voice I heard in the hall. She even coaxed me to play with toys she had brought in her luggage before thetrainers issued other dogs  their toys.  She stroked my pointy earsand told me I was a good boy, but I wasn’t too sure if I wanted to beresponsible for taking care of this female human, who didn’t seem to know aboutsteps, poles and cars unless I told her where they were.  Being a guidedog looked awfully hard to me , when you got down to It--for real.



               



               By the second week of working with my new friend, I had decided she was allright.  I didn’t have to share her with other dogs like I did mytrainer.  She was all mine.  The day I watched another dog make amistake and get corrected and then led my lady carefully around the obstacle, Igot so excited, I jumped in the air, put my paws on my person’s shoulders andkissed her face.  She laughed and gave me a hug and we were off on ajourney together as blind woman and dog guide, a team!  We were twoagainst the world, united by trust and affection.



 



               One day we went to New York City. I expertly guided my lady through the bustling crowds. There were so manypeople, carts, even someone in a wheelchair that I had to work reallyhard.   I stopped at each street corner and reached across her bodyto touch my nose on her right hand to ask, “Did I do okay?” While we waited forthe right time to go across the street, she stroked my head and I knew I wasdoing just right.  We rode the subway and I found her a seat, even when Ihad to make someone move to secure one.  It was a busy and a little scaryday.  Another time, we went for a walk in the woods.  I had neverguided anyone on a trail before, but it wasn’t hard at all.  By this time,I knew just how to signal when to step up or down and how big a difference inthe path my lady could handle without tripping.  I was so proud when Iheard my trainer say how well I did.  The trainer said that the new teamjust flowed over the ground together.



 



               Finally, the day came when we went to the airport to leave for my newhome.  I didn’t like the plane ride much.  I was nervous about thenoise, smells and tight spaces.  I wanted to stretch out and lie flat onmy stomach with my tail out behind and take up about six feet of floorspace.  I didn’t see why I should fit under an airline seat or not standupto see who was walking by in the aisle.  I was sure glad when we got offthe plane.  But then, we got on another and it started all overagain!  No fun as far as I was concerned.  Little did I suspect thatI would learn to take travel in my stride.



 



               After we got home, I met a lot of other family and friends.  I tried toget the kitties that lived in our house to play with my Kong toy with me. They just couldn’t seem to get it!  It took a while for us all to settle intogether.  Although a Kong wasn’t their thing--go figure, the kittieseventually played chase games and came over to butt heads against me and liedown with me.  Other people in the family discovered I liked to chasesparkles or flashes of light around the floor and wrestle.  I had a lot oflearning to do about new places my lady wanted to go too, such as  thetwenty-minute walk to the bus stop.  



 



               At the end of the month, we went on a long car trip to Los Vegas.  Iguided my lady in and out of restaurants and hotels.  I even took her into one where people dressed up as aliens walked around. They didn’t fool me,cause they still smelled like people!   The best fun was in a placecalled Cesar’s palace.  There was a huge aquarium wall and for a moment, Iforgot to guide and jumped up on a bench to flatten my face against the glassto watch the fish.  My lady scolded me gently but I knew she wasn’t verymad because she said that my trainer had forgotten to teach me about catfishdistractions. 



 



               The next spring, I found myself aboard a plane again going to Cancun Mexico. I got to see and iguana and wondered what it would be like to play chase withone.  But I didn’t try, because I knew that chase games were not allowedwhen my harness was on and I had work to do.  Being a perro guia, (Spanishfor dog guide) was an important job.  Whether I was guiding my mistressonto a bus, or through a market full of vendors, I kept my mind on keeping hersafe.  We went in to restaurants, shops, and hotels, walked along beaches,around fountains and pools and enjoyed the sunshine and interesting sounds andscents. 



 



               By the next fall, I had been to a national convention of The American Councilof the Blind, where I saw a lot of dog guides working.  I had also taken atrip to Hawaii.On that trip I finally learned why my lady wanted me tucked up neatly.  Ihad gotten backed up under the seat ahead of her but insisted on stretching outwith my paws and head on the rail under her seat.  When the plane made asteep climb leaving Los Angeles,I slid over the bar and out in to the row behind where my owner sat. Isurprised the two teenaged girls sitting there.  The presence of my tailhad startled the man sitting in the row ahead of her too. By the time we made areturn flight though, I was beginning to be an old hand at air travel.  Iknew just how to wriggle under the seat ahead of my lady and position myself soshe could brace me with her feet.  There, I relaxed and snoozed until wereached our destination. 



 



               Each trip brought new experiences and I began to look forward to going to theairport.  I watched carefully as my dog bag was packed with my travel bedmat, food, favorite toys and grooming brushes.  By age five, I had visitedWashington D.C. twice, guiding my lady as she visitedher Congressional representatives and attended meetings.  I had gone to Mexico once more and stayed on three differentislands in the Caribbean, where I heard aFrench name for dog guide.  I had taken her all by myself to another ACBConvention, where I got to see my trainer.  That was fun, but I pretendednot to see him because I was showing my lady the door she had asked me tofind.  So I didn’t even turn my head but kept looking at the door to proveto her I was her dog one hundred percent.  



 



I had learned how to travel on boats,trains and buses as well as planes.  I had learned to love my work as Iguided my lady to business meetings, doctor’ and dentist appointments, to thebank, across town, to church, to school so she could take computer classes, ortalk to children, to shop in malls, to movie theaters, and to work.  Nomatter where she wanted to go, I had learned how to get her there safely, andtogether we could travel and explore this wonderful world.  A young boyhad taught me manners and given me love.  A man had taught me to think andto shoulder responsibility for the safety of a blind person.  Finally, Ihad been matched with a lady who loved my clownish behavior, praised myintelligence, beauty and needed my protection and my care.  Each day, Idrop my toys to run eagerly forward to thrust my head in to my harness. We work together to form a partnership based on affection and mutualrespect.   Thanks to my puppy raiser, my trainer, and my own hardwork, I know I have the best of all possible jobs.  I am a  SeeingEye dog.



I think this ismarvelous! 



Griffin was nearly as timid as was Teddy. He truly wanted to please and tried hard to understand what I wanted.  Onour first trip to Washington D.C. I was faced with a mountainof luggage in which my bag was stacked.  I needed to meet my ride outfront and there wasn't anyone around to lend me a hand.  I exclaimed,"How will I ever find my bag!"  Griffin stepped to my right and laid his headacross a small familiar rolling suitcase.  I had never taught him tolocate my possessions, but he did understand the word find paired with thingslike an elevator, stairs, chair etc.  He drew the conclusion I wanted himto find something and my suitcase containing his rug and toys was the onlything that seemed likely 



Griffin was beter than Alexa.



to him. Sometimes, Griffingot overwhelmed by the difficulties of finding our way in new and strangelocales.  When his confidence began to wane, I found he could be reassuredif I sang to him as we walked.  If you happened to cross the capitol mallin Washington D.C.



During one of our visits, and spotted alady chanting Army cadence:



 



I don't know! 



But I've been Told!  



Getting lost can sure grow old!



Pick ‘em up and lay ‘em down.



Come on Griffin, go to town! 



 Andhope nobody is looking around.



It was probably me and my Griffindog, trying to visit the two senators and 8 members of the house of Representatives from Colorado.



I love this.  



Griffin also helped me through another lifetransition. I would have had a difficult time adjusting to no longer having anychildren in our home in Colorado.Our youngest daughter decided not to go to college. She insisted on marryingher high school sweetheart shortly after she turned eighteen. Having Griffin to nurture andshape into a star dog helped me to weather the inevitable stresses of emptynest syndrome.



How did that marriage work out?



 



Curtis and Iopened a fair trade gift shop in the historical district of Colorado Springsknown as Old Colorado City.It kept us busy and gave us a good excuse to travel. Eventually we were sellinghad-crafted items from over 35 countries. Although we never made much money, weenjoyed the work and the feeling of contributing to third world economics. Weexplored the available technology such as bar code scanners, programs to keepinventory and ordering that operated with screen-reading talking programs. Itook classes to become more computer savvy. I was able to get some writing doneand published. 



Not since working with Tammy had myteamwork been so effortless. I wrote the following poem on a sixteen block walkfrom my fair trade shop to my dentist’s office.



Dancers



We are cloud dancers,



You lead and I follow.



Our steps synchronized



Our bodies swaying to the same rhythm.



 



Swept along in the current of the jet stream.



Floating lightly on the swell of an updraft,



Swooping into a glide down the slope of a downdraft.



Side slipping around a gaggle of migrating geese.



Pausing a few beats to let a thunderhead rumblepast.



 



Through fog and mist through falling snow wewhirl,



Our movements in perfect unison.



Where your paws lead, 



My feet follow.



What does it matter,



If only we two hear the music.



We move together as one being.



We are Cloud dancers, you and I. 



 Ihave read this poem before._______________________________________________




 


Martia



Beautiful poem. Abennediction. I like that it reveals so much of the writer. I believe it takescourage to be unabashedly optimistic because it leaves so vulnerable. But when we are in love, it is unthinkable to beotherwise 




 


Ciara’sFirst Steps 



 



 Oneyear ago, like an undiscovered planet, you were yet to be named. 



Consider: You were a planet.



Boyor girl unrevealed, you wanted to surprise us.



Wouldyou appear blond and blue-eyed like my daughter, your mom, 



Orwould you bring out your Dad’s exotic Hispanic side? 



 



Earlyin the New Year, 2018, you arrived on your aunt’s birthday. 



Wasit an omen? Would you reflect my younger daughter’s passion and energy, 



Orwould you walk in your big brother’s footsteps? 



Yourinfant eyes follow his antics with fascination.



 



Sevenyears ago, when your brother was born, I wasn’t ready to be called “Grandma.” 



WhenQuinton presented himself, to my delight, I became the happiest reluctant“Nana” on the planet. 



Ithought one perfect grandson in a lifetime was more than this pessimistic oldlady deserved. 



Iwondered if my heart would have room for more than one favorite grandchild.



I love this line.



 



Ciara,now I know how a grandparent’s heart can grow big enough for a garden full ofgrandchildren.  



Arare wildflower, you emerged with a twinkle and a mischievous grin all yourown. 



Meaning that these wereunique, not inherited, qualities.



Yourelectric energy pulsing in my palms proves that each child is unique. 



Likesnowflakes and butterflies, each one is perfect.   



Maybe there is an overuse of ‘like.” 



 



You’rethe perfect baby sister for your perfect big brother.  



Will this feeling of perfection last whenthey become teenagers?



Imaginehow you’ll walk and run, talk and sing, play games, and help your parents likehe does. 



You’lllook out for each other, and help each other shine. 



You’llenhance each other’s brilliance like the colors in a rainbow.



I think you are in love, and lovers seeonly through lovers’ eyes. 



Asyou take your first steps, trust that you are not alone.



Yourparents, grandparents, big brother, aunts, uncles, and cousins love you.



Asyou learn to walk, the world is unfolding at your feet.



I love this line.



Runand skip, with our love, into your second year.



 ---------------------------



Sally




 


I love this piece for a lot of reasonsincluding poecy stark reality and depth.                                       NIGHT WIND



 



 



Insistentwind rattles the windows,



Nice W alliteration.



Jarringme from heaing sleepl



Nice long E rhyme.




 


Ithowls through bare branches and



Nice B alliteration and R  sounds.



Bendsthem into submission or,



Nice em and en rhyme.



Becauseit can, snaps the defiant.



Nice use of onomatopoeia .



Morningwill be time enough



Toascertain damage.



This is one place whee I think  ‘the’ would work in front of ‘damage.’  The rhythm would be a little better.



 



Ihave reached an age when



Resilienceagainst life’s storms and pain 



Isbetter measured in the light of day.



These 3 lines can mean different things. Ilike that quality here. One interpretation is that the murkiness of darknessand sleep  mars our objectivity. It is acondition that  often accompaniesgraowing age. It is better to wait for the clarity of the light a dawn. Theseare all potential metaphors. A word that holds a lot of this meaning is‘sun-downing. My brain seems to work better in the morning. Also, things lookmore optimistic in the clear, refreshing light of dawn.



Tuckingmy blankets close 



Aroundmy aching body, I sigh



Andslip back into the welcome unknowing.



 Beautiful 3 lines  conceptually. Srrender and acceptance arewords that come to mind.  Another is‘letting go.’   Litterally, fallingasleep is  is an escape from pain ,physically and mentally.



 



                                                                               Sally Rosenthal



 




 

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