[Critique Group 1] Mary-Jo's comments for May, Very Late

[Mary-Jo Lord]

## Forward

Deanna

 

I like the way that you set the scene of the time that the book takes place.
Specifics like Birth Control pills just becoming on the market and the
mention of social change put the reader in the atmosphere of the book.

 

I like the parallels between the young dog guide user and the dog guide,
both growing and maturing. This forward does what it is meant to do. It
tells the reader what the book is about and also sets up the argument about
the value and cost involved with training a dog guide. 

 

There is a space run at the beginning of the paragraph that starts with "A
dog guide can be so much more than a mobility aid to a blind person."

 

## Phillip's Burden

Cleora

 

This is a cute story. It demonstrates the importance of good communication
between children and adults. Phillip thought the store owner believed that
he had meant to steal the toy. This caused him to avoid going to that store
for a year. It was a nice resolution when he had to explain his sister's
actions.

 

## A Day with Dad

Marcia

 

The dialogue in this piece works really well. You managed to make what could
be a sad and frustrating experience pleasant and at times humorous. I really
like your dad's view on the bathroom situation. I also was amused by his
inserting the quote on his tea mug into the headlines of the newspaper.

 

I found two lines with space runs.

Poised at the opposite end of the breakfast table, my 92-year-old dad
nibbles toast and sips his morning tea  while I settle my guide dog and set
up my laptop.

Look between tea and while.

that girl has a problem. Look, look  at her face."

Look between look and at.

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