[Critique Group 2] Emailing: The Exquisite Pain of Being

[James]

Hello Friends of Group-2,
This piece is the companion piece to "An Integral Part of Life" which I
submitted last month. They were  written about 3 weeks apart with this being
the first. I was attempting 2 things. The first is my continued interest in
trying to write from a female prospective. The second is an exploration of
the first key moment when innocence is shattered forever. 
***

The Exquisite Pain of Being
C Brad Corallo
Word count 99

Behold the delicate, shattered, spun glass sorrow 
of the inconsolable nine year old grieving girlchild.
As she kneels, weeping beside her dead pony.
With blood and froth on
its lips and nostrils.  
The light in its eyes extinguished!

Such epitomizes the loneliness and sense of loss
deep within the human spirit!
 These poignant moments are insignificant  
within the evolution of the universe. 
Yet, to her they overwhelm 
everything encompassed in the framework of her being. 

Inevitably somehow, life goes on.
Though the sunshine in her eyes 
shall be slightly dimmed forever! 

jamesstarfire at gmail.com


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