[Critique Group 2] Today's session and six years of critiquing

[Joan Myles]

Brad, I'll miss you this afternoon! But thanks for sending along your
thoughts. The word "wether" means a sheep, a male sheep castrated while
immature. Take kare, and hope to connect more directly soon!
jm

On Thu, Jul 28, 2022 at 7:35 AM James Rock <jamesstarfire at gmail.com> wrote:

> Dear friends of Group-2,
>
> If you are reading this email, I am finally getting my new computer
> system today. Yes, after 52 days of decreased capabilities, it is
> finally happening. I truly regret not being able to attend todays
> session. I have enclosed my critiques so I can at least be there in a
> small way. It has been an incredible learning experience to be part of
> this group for the last six years. I have tried to send my critiques
> both as  an attachment and in the body of this email. I sincerely look
> forward to our next session in August.
> Warm regards, Brad
> ***
> 7-28-22.Critiques for Group-2
>
> 1. Val’s 7-26 replacement piece:
>
> A piece about a formerly highly valued relationship which has
> profoundly soured. The relationship was with another female: friend,
> mentor mind/heart connection with whom much was shared. The poet
> doesn’t seem to understand why this person has abandoned the
> relationship and her. A starkly rendered poem of uncomprehending loss.
> Unfortunately the longer we live the more likely we are to have such
> occur in our lives.
>
> 2. Leonard’s piece:
>
> This piece works at multiple levels. It tells of a flourishing garden
> which is maintained with love and work. It serves to provide
> sustenance for an array of living things. There is the realization
> that in spite of efforts to preserve it, there is an inevitable
> sharing which sustains both its natural denizens and the gardener
> himself. It tells of a special world of nourishment and harmony.
>
> 3. Alice’s piece:
>
> A poem that paints a picture of a family historical saga using
> acrostic structure. It is a very fitting piece for July 4th. It is a
> story of hardship and triumph. “Did they take an enormous chance?” I
> would say that they certainly did! However such is often necessary to
> realize a dream and reap great blessings. Two questions: was
> “braveness” used instead of “bravery” for the rhythm of two syllables
> instead of three? Also, where in northern Italy is the Levone Valley?
>
> 4. Joan’s piece:
>
> Crows are often seen as birds of ill-omen. This nicely constructed
> piece composed of seven, four line stanzas with an AB-AB rhyme scheme
> takes up this idea. They make a raucous cawing as a hawk stoops upon
> its prey. The rapidity of same is both surprising and alarming. Is it
> crow nestlings or something else that the hawk reaps? The instance of
> ill-omen is that of the prey not of the hawk. This depicts one of
> those things in nature that is difficult to easily accept. Just one
> question: what does “wethers” mean?
>
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>
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