[Critique Group 2] For 10-25-16 Group 2 critique session: Emailing: The promise of the Guardian

[James]

The promise of the Guardian
C by Brad Corallo
Word count 301

With water diamonds sparkling in her eyes
fell Guardian of Morning, through twilight autumn skies.

In skewed formation, birds around her flew
their gold eluminated by light no longer true.

>From her hair were scattered brilliant blazing sparks
bits of Morning love which
all did reach their marks. 
At the point where crystal blue caressed the land
her Light touch down ,
morphed, to bright triumphant stand. 

"I am Guardian of Morning returned
and I bring renewal of the days.
I decree this is once again
the First Morning
where all is washed clean with freshness dawning. 
Love will rein as Lord of
all emotion and sensation.
and the wonder of creation
will be as light in the eyes of the children. 

These things all, I clearly see
and nothing will prevent them, I decree!" 

But far off in grumbling grayish growling gremlin gloom
loathsome chattering time demons from the mists began to loom.
They would not see their Confining work undone.
They were committed to the dimming of the sun. 

Among their tools were tedium, repetition and routine.
They worked to bind free spirits
with chains of time unseen.

At Forever Plains they fell upon her.
She swept them from her path like shattered dreams.
And strode forward undeterred, resolute with her renewal quest redeemed  .

In multitudes, they once again fell upon her like a hand.
Their sheer increasing quantity her burdon to withstand.

Their waxing mass eventually bore her to the ground.
The light of the renewal no longer could be found.

But the bits of love that earlier showered from her hair
sowed seeds of hope and will to joy which ever fought despair. 

So down the yawning ages her legacy remains
and whenever spirit hearts give freely, demon power wanes.

jamesstarfire at gmail.com  
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