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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=EN-US link="#0563C1" vlink="#954F72" style='word-wrap:break-word'><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal>Marcia,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>In Defense of Pedestrians<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This would make an excellent article or letter to the editor for your local paper. It might also work as a submission to any of the blindness specific magazines such as the E-forum. It is well crafted, and I couldn’t see any areas that might be improved. The only jarring note came when you used the acronym EV for electric vehicle. I am not used to seeing those capitalized letters and had a momentary pause to figure out what you meant.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Cleora,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoPlainText>Undone<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Your first sentence uses time twice. Perhaps, change the first instance to read: <span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Cleatta arrived at the hotel early so she would have time to explore and become familiar with the territory.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal>You need a right quotation mark after yes, “<span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Yes, said Cleatta.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoPlainText>“I used to have a card with a dolphin on it years ago. It was stolen.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This needs a closing quotation mark also.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>weekly. Should be spelled weakly. The word with two E’s means every week.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>A burglar doesn’t need a capital a.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>I didn't have any money. Only the card. Should be written as one sentence with a commaafter money instead of the period and with no capital letter for only.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Interesting turn of events. I am not sure though that having someone who knows Audrey involved in stealing credit card numbers really works. I think you could take the story in a different direction if the card mysteriously appears on Jason’s desk and the word Infected appears on his computer screen after he uses the card to make some phony online purchases and moves the money by transferring the funds into a different account. He could be puzzled at the word infected appearing on his screen and be startled when he turns around to see a white cane standing in the corner of his office. You could still have Audrey tell Cleatta that she had a card with a dolphin on it once and what happened to it in the bar. I think it would be more likely for the maid to use a scanner device to copy the info off Cleatta’s card. She could then send it on to her partner without doing anything with it herself but receive a fee in her account from Jason. That would constitute in some blurring of her vision for her part, but Jason, the credit card buyer would be the one infected because he used the card. The money he sent her account might just disappear from the maid’s account once he did use it. If he subsequently sold the number on the dark net, the infection could spread and the card could be on its way to continue bringing carmic punishment to other thieves around the world. You have already made it possible for the card to keep haunting the original thief by reappearing until it gets stolen again. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Leonard,<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoPlainText>Barny’s Waning<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>You used the word large twice in the following sentence: His sire must have been a large dog, because Barny is twice as large as his mother. Try cutting out (as large as) and substitute the size of his mother. After the word twice.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'> <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>DeAnna Quietwater Noriega<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Cell: 573-544-3511<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Email: </span><a href="mailto:dqnoriega@gmail.com"><span style='color:#0563C1;mso-ligatures:none'>dqnoriega@gmail.com</span></a><span style='mso-ligatures:none'><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>Author of <i>Fifty Years of Walking with Friends<o:p></o:p></i></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><i><span style='mso-ligatures:none'>https://www.dldbooks.com/dqnoriega/</span></i><span style='mso-ligatures:none'><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div></body></html>