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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=EN-US link="#0563C1" vlink="#954F72" style='word-wrap:break-word'><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal>Sally<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Recovery<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I liked it. The only thing I could suggest is that it is too short. I think you could add another verse to bring things to a start toward back to health. That might make it fit the title better. You could change the title to recovering if you believe the poem is finished as is. Your economy of words is one of your talents.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Leonard,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Violin,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>There is a space after several words before punctuation. I will list the words or phrases you should check to remove such spaces:<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>craftsman in the first sentence,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Come together,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>vitality entered,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Voice,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Creation,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>The two letter Y’s should be written Y-y-yes if you intend this as a stutter.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Delete the words (then quickly)<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Marcia<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>The Fatalists<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Controversial, but well reasoned. Adding personal experience and using elements to demonstrate the sense of helplessness in modern life. You did an excellent presentation of both the double standard and the lack of concern for children living in poverty and the demand they be born even when doing so condemns both the children and the women who are forced to bear them. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Cleora,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Chapter 7<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You refer to Ginger as a faery, and a nymph. My understanding is that nymphs are full-sized humanoid creatures associated with woodlands, springs or bodies of water. Pixies, fairies, leprechauns and brownies are small magical folk. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>And presents underneath, try with presents underneath.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>John opened his mouth, (revise by cutting some of the verbiage here,) but closed it without saying anything.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>To see her father, (head down) should be head-down. Slump shouldered, should be slump-shouldered.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>There is room here to use the grandmother to help the family understand that it is in their best interest to work-out their problems together. It is likely she wants the best for her daughter and her children. Misty and Connie need to realize that their mother having her own dreams isn’t a rejection of them. John needs to understand that his wife fears being left caring for an empty home and that if his wife does finish her education, gets a job, it will benefit the family financially. Working with his wife to achieve her dreams doesn’t mean he is losing anything, but could build a stronger relationship with his wife and daughters. Each one of the family needs to view their problems not as a personal tragedy, but a shared challenge.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>DeAnna Quietwater Noriega<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Cell: 573-544-3511<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Email: <a href="mailto:dqnoriega@gmail.com"><span style='color:#0563C1'>dqnoriega@gmail.com</span></a><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Author of <i>Fifty Years of Walking with Friends<o:p></o:p></i></p><p class=MsoNormal><i>https://www.dldbooks.com/dqnoriega/</i><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p></div></body></html>