[Critique Group 1] Leonard's comments on DeAnna's pieced

[tuchyner5 at aol.com]

This is a truism effectively written..  

The disaster the poem describes will happen. Ishappening. 

But it has a way out. 

We can use our cleaverness to undo the damage. 

We can restore what we have nearly destroyed. 

But, even then, we will suffer greiveously 

the pain and suffering we have inflicted.

 

176 words:

 

My Brothers and Sisters Are Dying

By DeAnna Quietwater Noriega

 

Noriega sub for Feb 22

 

 

Today I cried for the manatee and the polarbear.

My heart is broken

that we have forgotten

we are all children of Mother Earth.

 

We once understood this as the truth of allliving things.

We shared clean water,

we breathed the sweet air.

We were all part of the dance of life.

 

Then human beings became proud of how clever wewere;

Inventing machines

That polluted air,

Ignoring the damage of our greed.

 

We covered the sweet earth with cities and vastfactories.

Such clever monkeys,

Polluting water

Thinking that there would always be more.

 

We kept building and spreading across the faceof the earth.

Cutting down forests

Ignoring the deaths

of other life forms that were not us.

 

We didn’t believe that we would ever have to payback

for our waste and greed,

for our disregard,

for demanding more than our fair share.

 

If we don’t use our cleverness to undo thedamage,

our foolishness caused,

we’ll die together.

our children and the blameless manatee.

 

 
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