[Critique Group 1] Cleoras notes for September

[sitting.duck at springmail.com]

comments for Sally
part 1
I love most of it.
maybe at the beginning, instead  of small - modest or humble book for the wee, lone or lonely hours
part 2
just a thought 
hot chocolate, instead or combined with coffee
I think of chocolate as a comforting beverage.
 
comments for Marsha
I feel the dismay at being caught by someone you would rather avoid.
Veronica is all about herself. She did make a positive comment even if it isn't welcome under the cercomstances.
possible type-o
“Quit? Why? Please! If a man pisses someone off at work, does he gets fired? No, he gets a promotion for showing he has balls. Well, women have balls, too. You should be asking for a raise.”
get instead of gets
Despite how annoying “Quit? Why? Please! If a man pisses someone off at work, does he gets fired? No, he gets a promotion for showing he has balls. Well, women have balls, too. You should be asking for a raise.” is, she provided food for thought.
Again, a good well defined character not a duplicate of others in the story
I get the feeling of a reluctant friendship developing on the part of the main character with this character she doesn't like.
 
comments for Leonard
Typical be careful what you wish for story
well written, but no surprises here.
comments for DeAnna
A few little things as I read through, but when I looked back at them, I decided not to mention them
over all, good piece.