[Critique Group 1] submission for June (6/27/18) session

[sitting.duck at springmail.com]

I started writing this and  it got longer and longer, so I decided to break it up. This is part 1 of 3.
The Legend of Sly Duck
by Sly Duck

Part one 1310 words

Once upon a time there was a family of ducks in which the youngest was so near sighted that it was difficult for her to find food. She could swim very well, but when it came to flying and catching her food, she could only do so if the prey was very stupid, and came very close to her bill. Mostly, she sat in the water very still and waited for a fish to swim very close and then she would quickly snatch it up. For this reason, her family called her Sitting Duck. Whenever Sitting Duck tried to fly, she would run into a tree, or a mountain, or something else hard and unyielding. Eventually the time came for the family to fly south for the winter. Poor Sitting tried to fly along with the others, but it just wasn't working. Finally, her mother said, "It is just too dangerous for you to fly. You are going to have to walk south for the winter. Just stay on this road and you will finally reach the warmer climate. Be careful, and listen closely. If you hear anything approaching, quickly run into the grass, or bushes until it passes by." And so the rest of the flock lifted themselves into the air and left Sitting Duck far behind.
Sitting Duck did as her mother said, and followed the road south with her little tail wagging swiftly behind. Eventually she felt the vibration of footsteps coming toward her so she quickly ran to the side of the road and hid in the tall grass. As she was beginning to nod off, she heard a sort of chirping. Looking in the direction of the sound, she could just barely make out the form of a grasshopper moving slowly away in the grass. Moving quickly, she seized it in her bill and was about to swallow it down when it pleaded with her, "Please, little duck, if you will not eat me, I can surely help you." 
"What can you do for me, and I'm very hungry. I can hardly find food with my bad eyes. I would be foolish to pass up such an easy morsel. 
"I can see very well. I can ride on your back and be your eyes."
"If you will ride on my back and be my eyes, I will spare your life."
The grasshopper quickly agreed, and Sitting twisted her head around and dropped it on her back.
They traveled this way for several miles with the grasshopper alerting Sitting to insects and other tasty tidbits along the way. He also warned her when a predator was coming so they could hide until it passed.
One day they came upon an old castle that looked as though it had not been maintained in many ages. Weeds lined the sides of the moat, the rusty chains to the drawbridge looked as if they might break in a strong wind. One of the battlements lay in a heap of broken stones on the right front side of the castle. But, just across from the castle, was a beautiful clear crystal pond.
Sitting picked up the scent of the pond before the grasshopper told her about it. She flapped her wings eagerly, and was soon sitting in the middle of the cool pond resting her tired hot feet. 
"Here comes a fish," announced the grasshopper.
Sitting Duck prepared to snatch it up as soon as it was close enough, but when it was just out of sight, it said, "Oh, lady duck, please do not eat us. Know that if you are the new ruler of this land, we will serve you in every way we can. 
"Take over this land?" asked Sitting.
With that the fish explained that the land was once a mighty human province called The Crystal Pond, that had fallen into ruin after the mighty warrior king Hound of War that ruled it had been killed in a fierce battle. "There are many creatures here who will gladly serve you if only you will let us."
Sitting duck walked across the drawbridge that was totally able to hold her weight, and explored the castle. She found a hive of millions of bees in the left, rear battlement. "There must be tons of honey here," said the grasshopper.
"Are you the new ruler of the province?" asked the queen bee. 
"I guess so," said Sitting. "I believe it will meet my needs."
"If we can continue to live in this tower, I would be most grateful, and we will be proud to be of service in any way we can."
Sitting agreed they could stay where they were, since there was more than enough room for her in the rest of the castle.
What a fortunate break, she thought, she would not need to continue her journey south. The pond would make a very fine home for her and her grasshopper friend, the castle would provide shelter from the cold, and there were many insects available to eat.
"There is an ant mound," announced the grasshopper as they exited the castle into the garden in back.
The mound was so big that even Sitting could see it. She realized she was very hungry and hurried over to it as fast as her legs could carry her.
"Please don't eat us," cried a small voice deep inside the mound.
"What else would I do with a mound of ants?"
"If you are the new ruler, we can spy for you in the same way we did for King Hound of War."
Sitting thought for a while wondering why she would need a spy. "No, I think I will eat you now."
"Wait," said the queen ant. "I can tell you that at this very minute there is a messenger coming to tell you about the meeting ant the monarch of this kingdom's castle. If I am wrong, then you can eat me and all my subjects."
"Okay, but if you are wrong. I'm coming back and eating your entire mound." At this Sitting began to think maybe taking over the castle and pond might not be such a great idea after all. If she kept promising not to eat anyone, she would starve. So far all the food around promised to help her in exchange for her not eating them. What was she going to do about lunch. As she came around the side with the collapsed battlement, she noticed a puddle with Mosquito larva in it which she quickly gobbled up before they could plead for their lives.
Suddenly, Sitting Duck heard a shrill, buzzing voice behind her. "My babies, my babies." 
Sitting turned her head toward the sound. "Mosquito at twelve o'clock," shouted the grasshopper. As it came into her range of vision, Sitting Duck extended her neck swiftly, and snatched it out of the air with her bill. "Hmmm, very tasty."

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the kingdom: 
The great King Dragon of Legacy Of Dragons, the monarch of the kingdom of Heavenly Light, learning there was a new ruler in the
province of The Crystal Pond, sent a messenger to invite Sitting Duck to his castle and meet with the rulers of the other provinces in the kingdom.
"It is imperative that you come," said the messenger. "An enemy kingdom has been ravaging our lands for several days. Our former monarch was killed, and the current monarch has suffered great damage. The meeting is to come up with a plan. Every province is required to participate."
"But, what can I do," said Sitting Duck. "I'm no warrior. I am just a simple, peace loving duck."
" If you don't come, you will pay with your head."
"Oh, Well then, I will be happy to be there."
(to be continued)