[Critique Group 1] December Critiques

[DQ Noriega]

Sorry I took so long getting these sent in. I lost my original notes and had
to redconstruct them.

12/27/2017 Session

 

Mary Jo

Without the letter M

Ah, but then there would nary be a Mary. Then we would have to ccall you
Airy Jo, since a rose by any other name is supposed to smell as sweet,; a
poet would still have her talent should her name be something else. I can't
think of any language that lacks the sound M, but when other letters are not
used, they manage just fine.

As always, the poem is well crafted.

 

Marcia,

Caution

I have often listended to the long list of potential side effects gtiven
following the suggestion that viewer ask their physicians to prewscribe a
medication. I always figured that if my doctor considered a new expensive
drug necessary, she would suggest it to me herself. Why should I jump in
recommending it to her when I probably don't need it or she would have
brought it up herself. As for all of the dire side effects, if we stressed
ourselves over them beforehand, we might never even to to our doctor for
fear of finding out we ac tually need a medicatiojn. We might not even want
to get out of bed and leave our homes for fear of the hazards.

If you mean this to be a tongue in cheek humor piece, you might fill in the
missing letters with faceous ones.

 

Sally,

Thicker Than Water

I wondered if you intended this to be a prose poem since it has some poetic
lines. It evocates a wistful sadness. I hate to think of anyone so alone
even if it is by their own choice.

 

Cleora,

John

I think that how a person expresses shame, or distress is a culturally
learned thing that is acquired through observation. Instead of hanging her
head when scolded, the girl should turn her head away. Many born blind
people have to be taught to face someone they are talking too. Their natural
inclination is to turn their heads so as to put an ear toward someone they
are listening to. Dropping the head down is more of an effort to avoid eye
contact. Among Native Americans, to drop one's eyes is to indicate respefct.
To make eye contact is to challenge. To hold the head erec t and face the
person you are talking too is a western cultural norm. 

 

 

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