[Critique Group 1] submition for 3/1/17 session

[sitting.duck at springmail.com]

This is meant to be a fanciful piece about what life might have been for Adam and Eve when they lived in the Garden of Eden.
It is born out of many years of thinking about what life might have been like at that time and the experiences I've had with some very inept care givers over the past 20 or so years.
I hope you enjoy it.
cleora

Children of Dust 
by Sly Duck

Adam gently rubbed the herbal ointment over the injury behind the big Pterosaurs' ear.
It had lowered its great head almost onto the ground in front of him so he could reach it more easily.
"There, big boy, he said, patting the huge flying reptile's forehead gently. "I wonder what it is like to soar high above the earth the way you do?"
The big reptile lowered its head and neck until it rested on the ground. Its eyes looking straight at him seemed to be inviting Adam to come onboard. An image of Adam sitting on its back appeared in Adams' mind.
"hum," said Adam. "why not." He hopped aboard and the winged creature took flight with one thrust of its powerful wings.
High above the earth, Adam took in the scenery below.
He saw a herd of Mastodons making their way toward a large lake. A group of monkeys were conversing with a lion from their perch in the trees. For the first time he was able to see the top of the gigantic Tree of Life that grew in the center of the garden.
"It's magnificent," he gasped. Our God is indeed a magnificent God.
A little further on he saw Eve In the part of the garden that they cultivated for their own use.
"Hello down there," he shouted to her.
Eve looked up toward the sound. At first she thought it was the bird talking. Then, she saw Adam on its back waving at her.
"What are you doing up there? she shouted waving back.
"I can see everything from here," he shouted back.
"This will be marvelous for spotting problems that need to be taken care of."
"If you say so," she replied. As for me, I think I'll keep both feet on the ground, thank you," she said smiling up at him. 
"After I gather some veggies and fruit I thought I'd look around for something new. I'll bring everything back to our tree. Is there anything special you would like?"
"Sounds good," he said. "Whatever you decide will be fine."
Always the same answer, she thought to herself shaking her head.  "don't be late," "you know how the veggies start to wilt if they aren't eaten soon after picked."
"Okay, I'll be back around dusk," he promised as he zoomed away.

Eve gathered some blueberries, dug a few carrots, and put together a salad of cucumbers, lettuce, tomatoes, dandelions, kale and spinach leaves. She sprinkled some sunflower seeds and walnuts on top and squeezed a lemon over the whole thing. She put the blueberries in a bowl on the side.
She stepped back and looked down on her creation. It was colorful but pretty much the same thing they had had every day their whole lives.
I wish I could find something new, she mused. Maybe Adam will see something new from his lofty perch aboard the Pterosaurs.

When Adam returned he just plopped down on a rock and kicked back against the tree.
"Did you see anything new?" Eve asked.
"Nah," he said. "I moved a herd of woolly mammoths over to a larger field I spotted. The herd is getting too big. It was overgrazing the north side. There was a sheep caught in a bog so I had to pull it out and return it to its herd. Then there was a hippo with a toothache. Those things really have bad breath. A moose had broken an antler. By the time I got him fixed up, it was time to come back here for dinner.
"You know, honey, I was really wondering if maybe you spotted something new to eat," said Eve.
"no, not really, but I wasn't really looking."
"Maybe you could come with me and we could look together."
"Oh, sweetheart, you go on ahead. I'm bushed."
Soon after he ate he was snoring away as usual.
Eve looked down at him and sighed.
"well," she said I guess I’ll just have to do it myself, as usual."
Never mind that I've been on my feet all day gathering up dinner, then trucked down to the river to wash everything, rescued a baby bird dangling from a string of hair its mother used to make the nest, helped a mother deer give birth to her first doe, and then broke everything up in bite size pieces and had it ready when he came riding back. Oh well, she thought. I guess that's what it means to be a help meat.
With that, she picked up her basket and went off to see what she could find.
This is such a big place, she thought. Surely there is something around here we haven't tried.
"what about this," a voice said.
Eve looked around. "Who said that?" she asked.
"Up here," said the voice.
Eve looked up to see a rather large serpent sitting up in a nearby tree.
She immediately recognized the tree as the forbidden tree.  The tree that God had said they should not touch, look at, or eat from.
Now, you are probably thinking, she's already broke the rules by looking at it, right? Not so, what God meant was not to gaze at it with longing and curiosity. You, know, like a few thousand years from now Lot's wife will get turned into a pillar of salt for gazing back longingly as Sodom and Gomora get toasted.
Well, back to the story.
Gen 3:1-6  (NASB) Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said to the woman, "Indeed, has God said, 'You shall not eat from any tree of the garden'?"
And the woman said to the serpent, "From the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat;
but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, 'You shall not eat from it or touch it, lest you die.'"
And the serpent said to the woman, "You surely shall not die! For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."
When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; 
James 1:12-27 (NASB)
... But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death. 
Then, Eve put some of the fruit in her basket and took it back with her.
"Adam," she coaxed him awake. "See what I found?"
Adam yawned and stretch. Then, looking up he took the piece of fruit from Eve's hand. "Hum," he said. "I don't remember eating anything like this before. What is it?"
"I think we might call it an apple," she said.
"It seems strangely familiar," he said as he took a bite. Then he realized why it was familiar. It was the fruit from the forbidden tree. He tried to cough the piece up but it stuck in his throat creating a permanent bulge on the front of his neck.
"Woman," he said, "what have you done?"
"Don't you see?" she asked. "There is nothing bad about this fruit. It is just like all the other."
Gen 3:7- 7  Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked.
"you don't think so?" asked Adam.
"Oops," said Eve. "it seemed like a good idea at the time."
"Somehow I don't think things are ever going to be the same,  said Adam sorrowfully.