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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=EN-US link=blue vlink=purple><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal>Cleora, Part Ten<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>There is an error in word choice in the line that ends put it all behind her and (hid should be head) south.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>In the sentence where Sitting is recaptured and tied back up in a bag, the word (synched) should be (cinched).<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>In the line that says: (either of your lies,) I think she is talking about not wishing to hear lies from either the demon or grasshopper. Try : (lies from either of you.)<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>In the line where she hears retreating steps, you have written steppes, (the geographic kind.)<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>When you mention Sitting: (had drank it all. It should be written (drank it all) or (had drunk it all.)<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>When you mention her sniffing the pellets, you wrote sniffed of it. Try: sniffed them. When you wrote tasted like fish, you need a period after fish, since the next word is capitalized.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I think you moved the story along well with less digression. I noted the typos I found, but feel the story worked well otherwise.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Leonard<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Leaves’ Whispers<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I didn’t care for the title, Perhaps, The Whispers of Leaves<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Might work better.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I had trouble following the line breaks. Perhaps this is because looking at a braille display, the sentences were too long. I wondered if you meant this to be a prose poem. I think the poem worked, and don’t find any other things to comment on.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Sally<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Waiting<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I liked the poem very much. I was a bit confused by the different lengths of stanzas but did see that each completed a thought.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You captured a beautiful analysis of the creative process. Even when life drains us of the energy or the time to actually sit down to write, the poet in our heads takes notes.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Marcia<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Bathrooms for the Blind<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I had to read the first line a couple of times before I could untangle it in my mind. I think the problem was that you wrote sound track as two words. I opened a word document and tried them as a compound word and spellcheck didn’t object. It appears that even using them as a hyphenated word worked too. The word (Plays) following “Psycho” shouldn’t be capitalized.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>The word )proverbial) is misspelled with the Letter V, transposed with the letter B.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Don’t forget the rare but occasional foot control button to flush a toilet! <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You end the line with a period after the word box. You will need a capital letter on the word (the) in the sentence: The screeching in my ears increases.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This piece is humorous but all too recognizably accurate. When I am training a new dog, I add find sink, find trash to the list of find commands along with find stall. By preference, my dogs do look for the large one, but I have also worked with them to back in beside the commode or lie down so that I can close the door over their back if that one is unavailable. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Sorry I needed to leave abruptly. See you next month! <o:p></o:p></p></div></body></html>