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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body lang=EN-US link="#0563C1" vlink="#954F72"><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal>Hi,<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I’m sorry I won’t be able to make it tonight. My cousin is here from out of town.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Here are my comments.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>December 2017 comments<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>## THICKER THAN WATER<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Sally<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>How did the toddler gazing<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>With wonder at Santa Claus<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>In a treasured photograph<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Become an old man himself?<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I love this stanza, and the contrast between the toddler and an old man. The reference to the picture with Santa makes it real.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You might want to think about beginning the poem with this.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You demonstrate his love and kindness as a child. The next two stanzas compare the question of life events that broke his heart, and then medical heart problems. You end the poem showing his age, and your own sadness. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I like this poem. My favorite phrase is Put his humpty dumpty heart together again.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>## Through Thick and Thin<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Deanna<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You covered a lot of time and many events in this chapter.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I liked seeing the interaction between Kurt's family and you. Tammy's dislike of the English instructor shows that she had good taste. Her pranks were amusing.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You need a comma between sweet and funny in this sentence.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>He was sweet funny and kind. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I enjoyed this chapter.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>## Caution<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Marcia J. Wick, The Write Sisters<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This is a humorous takeoff on adds for or fliers that accompany medications. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>You have some lines with stray punctuation.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>hepatitis B , A space before the comma.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>loss of skin pigmentation , a space before the comma.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>lymphoma , A space before the comma.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>mental/mood changes , A space before the comma.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This might also read more smoothly if you removed and changed some effects beginning with a or an. For example: an asthma attack: asthma . a bladder infection: bladder infections.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I think the ending brings us back to reality.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>## John<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>Cleora<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>This was interesting to see life from John's perspective. The meaning of retirement in this world that you have created is an interesting and controversial topic. I wonder if John was bothered by the "retirement" of Grandpa before he met Dejanna.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal>I enjoyed this chapter.<o:p></o:p></p></div></body></html>